Sitting Tricks [VIDEO]

Maybe sitting around with some friends, not in your right mind, "Be cool if they could make a sport where you could just sit." "Dude...totally."  Your thoughts in the comments.

Better Blogger Importer: Wordpress Plugin

Download Better Blogger Importer Here

Created this blogger importer plugin for WordPress because the one that comes with WP, blogger.php, was ignoring comments. It could be because the client needed to import tens of thousands of comments and blogger is simply failing (which also happens if we attempted to simply export as a file from blogger).

So I made this. It allows you to pick a month and a year, then it'll grab the posts and comments for that month. It will ignore duplicates, so it can be run over and over again. Hopefully, it'll help someone else. Use at your own risk. I recommend doing your own testing and dry runs first.

To get it going:

• It requires the Zend GData Framework installed on your server. Can find instructions for installation there as well. For myself, it was simply a matter of adding the path to the GData library to the PATH environment variable. Really surprised and pleased at how easy it was. Your mileage may vary.
• You have to edit the plugin first. It requires a blogger username and password. Open the file in your editor of choice and search the source code for "monalisa25@gmail.com" without the quotes. You'll find two vars: $bloggeruser and $bloggerpass. Put in the appropriate values.
• Place the file in the /wp-admin/import/ directory of your WordPress installation and upload.
• Browse to your WordPress admin Import section. Should see Better Blogger Importer as an option.
• First, it'll ask you to select a blog. Do so. (Some ppl have more than one under the same account.)
• Now, it'll ask for a month and a year. Select your choices and hit Submit.
• When it's finished, you should get a small report with the posts and comments tally. Again, it'll check to see if a post or comment already exists, and if so, will skip it.

You may notice how ugly the code is. There was a sense of urgency during its creation, and as long as it worked, no one seemed too picky. Besides, it was my first foray into WordPress plugins and the gdata framework. So suck it.

I'm sure someone out there can make this thing rock in ways I can only imagine.

Good luck! Hope this helps someone.

-Jason

Edit/Update:

Two issues have cropped when moving to production server:

Problem: the Zend GData library couldn't be found. (I thought it had been installed).

Solution: You need to upload the Zend library, then let your script know where it is.

So...I downloaded the library from here. Using WinRar, I extracted only the /library/ folder into the root of the site which gave me .../webroot/ZendGData-X.X.X/library. I renamed ZendGData-X.X.X to ZendGData (for simplicity's sake).
Next, I determine the absolute path of the web directory by uploading a temporary script that printed out $_SERVER['DOCUMENT_ROOT']. Using this, I came up with this path:

/var/www/vhosts/examplesite.com/httpdocs/

Use that path to craft this bit of code:

$zendpath = "/var/www/vhosts/examplesite.com/httpdocs/ZendGdata/library/";
set_include_path(get_include_path() . PATH_SEPARATOR . $zendpath);

Put that code just above the require_once 'Zend/Loader.php'; line in the betterblogger.php script. It should look something like this:

$zendpath = "/var/www/vhosts/examplesite.com/httpdocs/ZendGdata/library/";
set_include_path(get_include_path() . PATH_SEPARATOR . $zendpath);
require_once 'Zend/Loader.php';

That should tell your script where the Zend GData library is located.

Cool. But.

Hit another error.

Problem: Don't remember.

Solution: You may have to add this line to the betterblogger.php script:

Zend_Loader :: loadClass('Zend_Gdata_Feed');

And add it just below this line: Zend_Loader::loadClass('Zend_Gdata_ClientLogin');

So it should look like this in the script:

Zend_Loader::loadClass('Zend_Gdata_ClientLogin');

Zend_Loader :: loadClass('Zend_Gdata_Feed');

That fixed everything for me on this separate, evil server.

Ken Pierson of Habitat for Humanity is a Dick, IMHO

I'm copy-pasting an email I recently received. I was given permission to post this as long as I kept the informant's contact info confidential. I'm not responsible for the comments, opinions, facts, etc. that follow.

"I wanted an extra job. I'm a software developer but I'm freelance. I was a network administrator. A database administrator. I created training manuals and taught classes in the use of various software applications. I manage 22 websites.

My money comes infrequently from the freelance tasks, regularly from ads on the websites. Not a lot of money at all. So another job would be good.

But not just any job. I felt that a job with a charitable organization would not only satisfy my bank account, but my human spirit.

It was a warehouse job.

Prerequisite: Be able to lift 75 lbs. Be able to follow instructions.

Details: Apply in person at the Habitat for Humanity of Moore County, NC.

I printed up my resume, knowing it would have no real bearing on the job, but should indicate that I do have a capacity for following instructions. I mean, I'm a programmer for frak's sake. But a resume might indicate that I'm a serious person going about serious business.

So I show up at the office for Habitat for Humanity, resume in hand. They tell me to go next door and ask for one of two people.

They get Ken to show up and I ask him about the job vacancy as I pass him my resume.

He refuses to accept the resume. Instead, he leads me to a room and pulls a paper from a cabinet drawer. He never smiles. He never winks or nods or shakes my hand. He hands me the paper and talks to me like I'm mildly retarded, "This is an application. You need to fill it out front and back. Then you need to go to the clerk of court, get them to give you your criminal history. It'll cost $15. Get a receipt. Bring it back here, and regardless of what happens, we'll reimburse the $15."

He hands me the paper and walks away before I can ask any questions about the job. Questions like, "How much does it pay? What exactly are the hours? Are weekends involved? Do I need to purchase any special gear? Is there a lifting test prior to job placement? What's the corporate culture like?"

The entire experience was less than 5 minutes in length.

So I'm driving back home in my nice applying-for-a-new-job clothes-and-shoes, smelling good and feeling fresh, and I'm thinking about the task I was given.

It'd take an hour's worth of driving just to get to the clerk of court and back. He never mentioned anything about paying for the gas. Then there's the time out of my life I'd spend AT the clerk of court's department. That'd be a nightmare. It always is for me. Without exception, I somehow manage to always confuse bureaucracy. I don't have a criminal record, other than some traffic violations that are years in the past. But they'd manage to tell me, "Oh they moved random records to a holding facility in Kansas and yours happens to be part of that as there was no recent activity on them lol! It'll take 6 to 8 weeks for copies to get here." "Could they just fax them?" "Flax?! LOL"

So I deliberate for a day or so. I decided that I needed answers before I would accept the challenge. I called Ken at the Habitat warehouse.

"Hi, this is Jason. I was interested in the warehouse job, but I had some questions."

He pauses for just a second.

"Didn't you read the ad in the paper?"

"Online, actually, but yeah. However, it never said anything about wages."

He pauses again. (This pause somehow makes me feel guilty, like they were looking for someone who would cart things around just to make their hearts happy and remuneration be damned, but they would offer token payment so everyone would feel good).

He says:

"$8 an hour."

And then he hangs up.

He hung up on me.

They must have wanted someone who didn't care about pay.

So I met Ken twice. Once in person, and once over the phone. He was a bit of a dick both times. Well, to be honest, he was a complete dick the second time. I'm sure there's stress, and there are expectations of a person in his position. But it doesn't matter to me. I don't want to work for him, regardless of the excuses. He's running a charity warehouse. I think he doesn't see the bigger picture. I had a bunch of books (nearly a hundred) that I considered giving to charity. I've purchased my share of books from the Habitat store and had often considered donating. I sold what books I could through eBay and used book stores, but there were some that weren't purchasable because they were alread prevalent on the shelves. I was familiar with the book inventory at Habitat, so I knew they could use them. I thought I'd bring them in on my first day. Sure, I'd look like a kiss-ass, but you can't deny that I would have enriched their inventory, increased sales, further helped the homeless.

But thanks to Ken, I sold them to a used book store instead.

Here's to Ken, a stranger in a position of authority, a real bastard, a dark face on a charitable organization."

Watch Battlestar Galactica Season 3 Episodes 1 through 11

Links to all the episodes 1 to 11. If you haven't already, you have to install the DivX web player, but that's a good thing. Double-click the video while it's playing for full screen. Single-click the full-screen for scrubber and controls.

3x01: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1540965/Battlestar-Galactica-03x01-Occupation

3x02: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1540987/Battlestar-Galactica-3x02-Precipice

3x03: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1572091/Battlestar-Galactica-3x03-Exodus-1/2

3x04: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1572174/Battlestar-Galactica-[3x04]-Exodus-2/2

3x05: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1573823/Battlestar-Galactica-Collaborators-3x05

3x06: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1577463/Battlestar-Galactica-3x06-Torn

3x07: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1583036/BSG-3x07-A-Measure-of-Salvation

3x08: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1584835/bsg-3x08-Hero

3x09: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1585172/bsg-3x09-Unfinished-Business

3x10: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1588364/BSG-3x10-The-Passage

3x11: http://www.stage6.com/user/larkinbox/video/1588477/BSG-3x11-The-Eye-Of-Jupiter

if ur like me, you've not seen it on tv. i saw some reviews and gave it a shot with netflix. now i can't get enough. i'm highly particular. i won't watch shows if they have commercials. i'll rent a tv show, watch the first episode, and if it doesn't grab me, that's it. as far as i'm concerned, if ur a fan of sci-fi, and want some visual treats along with a good story, you'll not be disappointed.

GWIMB - Immediately Shitty

So he kicks off his muddy boots just inside the door.

Cooks some chili and leaves it out.

And leaves all his dishes in the sink.

I Understand Drugs and Alcohol

It's taking a vacation without going anywhere. It's easy to type that, but I have an argument to back it up.

I think that who you are at the core remains basically intact while under the influence of drugs and alcohol.

Sure, you can be stripped of restraint but that doesn't allow you to say "It made me do this or that".

It ALLOWS you to do what you really wanted to do anyway. It doesn't MAKE you do anything. The you that is you is always there.

Some people use drugs and alcohol as an excuse. They want to say or do something, so they use, then do what they will, always knowing that their poison of choice can be used to explain away their behaviour. Chronic abusers, who've already been in trouble over their use of judgment-altering chemicals and despite knowing that they do things that hurt themselves and others, will partake of their poison again, deciding that it's worth it.

It is a great excuse, a great facilitator. It can be purging and satisfying, can clear the air. It can also reveal people for who they are. When you are exposed to their uninhibited thoughts, it can reveal their self-righteousness, their personal demons, their longings, their weaknesses. It can be a raw and brutal honesty: ugly or enlightening or both.

Oh, it does alter you. But everyone is affected differently. But why is that? Various amounts can be consumed and yet those who should be more severely affected still retain a sense of civility while chronic users can take a mere fraction of that amount and become a sower of chaos.

The thing is, it doesn't surprise us. Some people seem to be tempered: either by experience, tolerance levels, wisdom, common sense, or simple courtesy. This goes down to their core and it would take a vast dose of elephant-disabling drugs to purge them of these self-defining characteristics.

Others find these social-lubricating qualities to be arbitrary restrictions and consider drugs and alcohol to be their liberators. They seethe at the seams, waiting for an excuse to be who they are at the core. You probably know them. Their jokes and asides always have an element of cruelty. They appreciate very little. They accept favors and gifts as due, or that these favors or gifts were given with an ulterior motive. These people are assholes waiting to happen.

Perhaps they find nothing in themselves to value, and so value nothing in others.

I don't like to hurt people. My motivation is basically selfish: I don't like people hurting me. There are entire treatises on the philosophy of selfishness, and how selfishness is the basis of even the most altruistic ventures.

It doesn't take page upon page of argument, metaphor and analogy to tell me that I'm motivated by my personal desires. If I give something, I only do it because I'm getting something in return, even if that reciprocal gift is merely my happiness with myself for doing so. Or maybe because the way I'd feel for not doing or giving something makes me feel less than happy, guilty even. Either way, in the end, it's all about me.

I had stayed dry for a bit. I had a reason, but it wasn't that important. I think too much, and get depressed and suicidal. I found I didn't sit around plotting murder, mine and others, when I felt the glee of alcohol in my veins. But after a dry spell, I start wondering how much longer I have to wake up to this shit.

So I said fuck it. I'm not hurting anyone by drinking, just me. If that shortens my time here, all the better, and in the meantime I get a chemical-semblance of joy.

So after a dry-spell, I take some shots, and I get back to my vacation/core-person theory.

I still feel like me, but the environment has changed. I know it's a result of my body's perceptions being distorted by a foreign chemical, but that bit of me that is me acknowledges that the world I perceive has been altered. So I am still here, just in a body whose wiring has been kinked.

Before, while sober, going to the bathroom meant taking off my headphones and heading toward the bathroom, my thoughts still on whatever project with which I was dealing.

While under the influence, the very act of getting up and heading down the hallway becomes an adventure in a strange, new world. The hallway is longer and darker than remembered, the walls are closer but taller. Even the color of the tiles spark thoughts in my head: it's like a a trillion morning glory flowers had been compressed into water-resistant blocks. If I concentrate, I can feel the sunlight they absorbed while they were alive trickling up through my feet. I know the tiles are ceramic, but entertaining these more romantic notions becomes easier, whereas I'd usually dismiss them as nonsense. The world is more interesting when I'm not sober.

Why do I have to drink to have these more-interesting thoughts?

Why do I have suicidal thoughts when I'm sober?

I'm aware of the perception-altering properties of certain molecules. I mean, 'taking a trip' especially made alot of sense in the context of LSD consumption. I've been there. What strikes me tonight, is the compunction. The desire. I could spend tons of dough and take a literal, physical vacation, ESCAPE. A BREAK. A HIATUS. Everyone wants to do it. A new start, a fresh beginning. Scrape off the old, embrace the new. Fresh sights, fresh smells, new ideas, new faces, new everything.

I could be enduring a long drive complete with crazy drivers coming at me at high speeds, crazy drivers passing me at high speeds only to meet up with them at the next intersection, completely alien surroundings in which to get lost, forced interaction and pleasantries with strangers, wear and tear on my vehicle, stops for gas and bathroom breaks, and then there's the going out for food, the items you forgot to pack, the huge amount of money you're spending for this temporary away-time (money that equates to diligent hours you've spent doing your job, day after day after day), etc... And in the end, you have to put everything together, then take the long drive back home and start the drudgery all over again. Isn't it that much harder after a break? Don't you realize how much you truly despise your job after a vacation? Who are you working for? But you've bought into the scheme, the ideal, the plan, the concept. You're life now requires that you do these things. To stop would invite disaster, and not just to you, but those you've brought along with you.

...OR, I could throw back a few shots and take a localized and cheap vacation, turning my present whereabouts into an interesting point of both departure and arrival.

So, here's to me. I'm not hurting you. I can help out on occasion. I feel good. George Bush is out of presidential terms. I'm not beholdent to an employer. And I have some interesting projects to work on.

So suck it.

Snoring Sound Effects

If you're into sound effects and you want some snoring, here's a few wav files:

http://www.mediafire.com/?fxtmdszya1x

http://www.mediafire.com/?dgj39sujelt

http://www.mediafire.com/?a1tsnbsmsgd

http://www.mediafire.com/?6h0nx1nzop9 <-- Snoring With Ambient TV audio (FEAR)